My grandma

Hi everyone,

My grandma (mom's side) passed away this morning in Vancouver. Over the last two years, her health had been declining, triggered by a broken hip, surgical complications, and then her liver cancer spread to her bones and other organs. It has been a rollercoaster journey for my family, especially for my mom and her five sisters, as they've travelled to Vancouver from HK and Toronto multiple times in the last few months. 

My grandma lived to her late 80s. By birth, she was like a princess, born into a wealthy family. She married my grandfather and had six daughters. When landlords were stripped of their properties and land redistribution to peasants occurred, my grandparents took their daughters and fled to Hong Kong. My grandparents were well-respected and loved by their servants, many of whom followed them to Hong Kong, helping the family adjust to the new environment as long as they could. My grandma, spurred with desire to survive, and without any guidance, had to learn for the first time how to raise her family: cooking, laundry, chores, making money through various jobs. Later on, my grandparents chose to move again, this time to Vancouver, to build a new life. For all that she experienced, the suffering and hardships endured, the transitions into the unknown, learning to adjust and overcome - she was a strong, strong woman.  

We praise God for her life and for the things she was able to experience in her last stretch: 

- She used to stubbornly refuse to hear or talk about God, telling us to "believe what you believe, i have no interest"

- In the last two years, she became open to having us pray for her and listened to the gospel when a pastoral team shared with her

- She saw my cousin get married, and met the next generation: her two great-grandchildren

- She saw all her daughters around her side in the past spring, and was able to share her final words and wishes with them, stating that she was content with her life

- Even up until the last few months, she recognized all of us as we visited at different times, fighting her drowsiness from the pain medications to open her eyes to greet us with a grunt, a nod, a smile if possible.

- She made it through another Chinese New Year and received all her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren's greetings. 

I had the privilege of visiting her this past January, not too long ago. I had just arrived from HK to spend one day with her. At my first visit, she was very tired, however, when she saw me, she called me by my Chinese name, before closing her eyes again. At first, it was tough to not be able to have a conversation with my grandma, but, her slumber was her gift to me. 

As I watched her sleep, I took her hand and napped on her bedside for three hours. My first afternoon nap with grannie! I remember waking up, feeling absolutely rested. When we woke up for dinner, I thanked her for telling me to sleep, and she had smiled. 

The next morning, my last visit, she was more alert. I showed her pictures of our family, and gave her the beaded cross that my 5th aunt had made for her. She said the cross was pretty. She could only move her head at this point, with no strength in any of her limbs. She followed me with her gaze as I hung the cross on the bulletin board beside her, just so that it was in her view if she wanted. She had grunted and nodded her approval, and again, "Mm, it's pretty." 

As I kissed her and said my good-bye, she was silent. For some reason, I had a feeling it might be our last time together. I think she felt the same. 

Was her passing expected, or unexpected? It was a little bit of both. She had hung on for so long since her first hospitalization from her hip fracture, that I shared my family's hopes that she might still hang on until May, our next trip. 

We miss her. A lot. Yet, we are also at peace. We are thankful and trust that God answered our cries to draw her to Him, and that she entered into God's embrace to experience His joy, peace, love and comfort. 

Thank you so much for praying for her and our family during the ups and downs of the last few months. It is all appreciated. Please continue to pray for my family as we mourn and celebrate my grandma's life.